How Rude are Your Readers?

by bee

i read . . .

this bit about the Ghaziabad municipal council installing mirrors on walls to deter disgusting men from peeing on them. This post is like a mirror - let the McNasties get a glimpse of themselves. I invite you to talk about your rude readers - what they do and say, and how they piss you off.

i believe . . .

the nonsense we have been reading in the comments form and e-mail by maybe 2% of our readers at Jugalbandi has truly made us appreciate the kindness and encouragement we receive from 98% of those who visit our site.

“Nonsense is to sense, as shade to light; it heightens effect” - Frederick Saunders.

Many have taken the extra effort to reach out to us personally and for them we are very grateful. This post is dedicated to the select few who act like overbearing relatives who invite themselves over and claim they are only trying to hellllp.

i refer to . . .

1. The "I want" types. They send us mail saying "I want a recipe for xyz." Or post a comment. Signed as Anonymous.

And I want a pony.

How about typing 'xyz' in Google? You'll get your recipe instantly. Google doesn't want to know who you are, or expect an introductory 'Hello'.

2. There are readers who make polite and constructive requests. Their opinions matter to us. They attempt to build a relationship before giving feedback. And they do it respectfully.

They don't just show up one day to proffer 'advice'.

The latter are the "You should" types. "You should write a post on abc." "You should write only food posts to get more traffic."

Really? Do you walk into strange people's homes and tell them they should change their drapes?

3. Is your recipe authentic?

We don't know if it's authentic, and we don't care. We don't even know what 'authentic' stands for.

4. Please stop talking about xyz, shut up and get back to the kitchen.

That's from HERE. The only way some folks can deal with cognitive dissonance is to ask others to 'shut up' in their own space - while they are sitting in a corporate office in Chennai and blog hopping during office hours.

5. The types who want you to think and make decisions for them. And want you to feel privileged for the opportunity to do so. Earth-shattering decisions like "Can I use potatoes instead of sweet potatoes in this dish??"

They are not just thinking aloud. They expect you to respond.

I mean, they really want you to say, "Sure, please use potatoes. The potato farmers will be grateful to you."

You post a pic with blueberries, and they ask: "What is the Bengali word for blueberries?"

They assume you know Bengali. If you don't, they assume you'll find out the Bengali word for blueberries. Just for them.

We have never once indicated that we are Bengali or know a word of Bengali.

Here's the deal.

You find out the Lithuanian words for "stupid" and "lazy". Then I'll make up a Bengali word for 'blueberries'.

Try ignoring them. If you don't respond to their comment, they will send you an e-mail, quivering lip and all, pointing out how they left you a comment in your post or an e-mail two days ago.

So what, again, is the Bengali word for blueberries? They can't sleep until they find out, and the cure to insomnia has to be delivered through your inbox.

They don't want the Bengali word for blueberries. They just want to piss you off.

Like this bloke from Turkey who wanted us to deliver a wholesale order for yogurt starter.

But we don't sell dried yogurt starter.

"But I want you to send me a consignment. Here's my company address."

Sorry sir, we don't sell dried yogurt starter.

"But I need a consignment of dried yogurt starter."

Sorry sir, we don't sell dried yogurt starter.

"But I need a consignment of dried yogurt starter and you said you use dried yogurt starter."

I use dried yogurt starter. I do not sell dried yogurt starter.

"But I need a consignment of dried yogurt starter."

And I need to report you as spam though your address and company are legit.

We blog for our pleasure. Some readers seem to lose sight of that.

There seems to be the belief that since the blog is a public forum, people can express themselves freely. True, but the comments form is not a carte blanche for encroaching personal boundaries. That's like some Shiv Sena politician in Bombay stating that women who wear revealing clothes are asking to be raped.

It doesn't matter what someone wears. The fact is touching another person without his/her consent is a violation.

i wonder . . .

why people take liberties on my blog that they wouldn't take in my home. Is it because they can be relatively anonymous online, and therefore can get away with things they couldn't get away with in a personal interaction?

Why do people leave comments and send emails as 'Anonymous' when they can use pseudonyms and do not have to reveal their identities? I don't have a problem with comments posted as 'Anonymous' as long as I am not expected to respond. I do have a problem with people sending e-mails as 'Anonymous', and asking rude, intrusive questions while seeking to be 'Anonymous'.

And it's no coincidence that the McNasties mostly operate as 'Anonymous'.

This site posts their e-mails for all to see. They are two teachers who run a site on a pretty non-controversial topic. They post information on insects, drawing upon their deep knowledge of the subject. It's interesting to see how many McNasties they get, and how often.

Describe the McNasities on your blog. How do they piss you off? How do you deal with them?